One Year Later

It is late.
We've had a hell of a week, month, year...
We're tired and stressed out and sad and scared and ...
But ... this is a date that ought to be noted before it passes.
One year ago today, Master and T embarked, with great bravery on a path that would forever change their lives -- we hoped for the better.  It has not been an easy path.  There has been pain and suffering and a very great deal of adjusting as both of them have worked to learn to live with their very significantly altered digestive systems.  With all of that, between them they've lost some 222 pounds.  That's notable, and I want it noted here in this place -- before we all move on. 

I am awfully proud of the two of them.  I am thrilled for the new and healthier lives that they have ahead of them because of this choice.  Some few, sour souls have insinuated that there was a lack of discipline that set all of this in motion -- made it necessary.  That's just pure, ignorant nonsense.  There are real medical reasons why some people cannot successfully control their weight, and there are weight driven morbidity issues that make finding a way to conquer the issue a critical life decision.  Choosing the path of bariatric surgery is not a simple decision, and anyone who believes it somehow provides an easy fix is just an uninformed fool.  The surgery gave my Master and my T the tools they needed to get control of their weight issues.  It was not any sort of magic.  They have done the work, made the changes, and won the battle.  Today, in the midst of everything else happening in our lives, I want to shout from the housetops that this is a "birthday" of sorts and deserves its own celebration.

swan

Valentine's Day -- A Year Later

One year ago, we took some pictures of Master and T on Valentine's day. They were glowing and wonderful, and so clearly in love -- but they were also, clearly, two people who had lost the battle with obesity...

Then, on March 23, 2009, they both had bariatric surgery for weight loss. Master had rouen y gastric bypass, and T had sleeve gastrectomy. They each recovered -- T quickly and easily, and Master with great difficulty and terrible pain. We learned our way along the path to a brand new relationship with food and eating and exercise and a whole host of new body-image issues and understandings. We went through an enormous pile of discarded, too-big clothes. Master joked that He was renting clothes from Goodwill as we purchased and then donated back bags and bags and more bags of garments.

As we moved through the year, Master lost 142 pounds and T lost 80 pounds. They are, today, both much lighter and much healthier.

And so, we come around the year to another Valentine's day, 2010. So, we got out the camera and took some more pictures -- and here they are. My lighter, but and even more beautiful Valentines... swan

Socks -- An Unexpected Benefit

He has always worn Gold Toe brand support hose.  They are a pretty premium men's sock, and they are made to provide some pretty intense compression.  They are advertised for the treatment of varicose veins, edema, and post surgical circulatory support. 

In the bad old days, before His bypass surgery, when He still weighed something over 300 pounds, when moving and bending were just too physically taxing for Him to attempt -- He'd pull those moster socks off and toss them in the hamper; always inside out.  ALWAYS.  It was just too difficult for Him to work them off His legs and off His feet without turning them completely inside out. 

We'd do the laundry, and then there remained the chore of turning all those compression socks back inside out so they could be mated and put away.  I know I never thought much about it.  It just was the way it was. 

Last weekend, wading through a pile of laundry, I got about 3/4 of the way through the pile of socks when it hit me -- they were all RIGHT SIDE OUT!  Wow!  Turns out that, having lost 142 pounds, taking off His socks is no longer a huge ordeal.  He can easily slide them down and pull them off, and they almost always end up right side out. 

I know it seems like a small thing.  It is a small thing, but it is one more small and unexpected benefit from all the changes that we've been through.

"After" Photos -- Nine Months

We have passed the nine-month mark since the bariatric surgeries (which happened back on March 23). It has been an amazing and wild ride to this point, and I don't think we really ever quite had a picture of where we would be at this point.

One of the things that has characterized our passage through this transition has been the sheer size of the physical change. Both Master and T have gone through many, many, many wardrobe changes as the pounds have fallen away. We've hauled bags and bags and bags and bags of discarded, too big clothing to our local Goodwill. Too, we've bought our share of "replacement" items from Goodwill. Master has laughingly remarked that He mostly just rents clothes from Goodwill -- keeping them for a few weeks and then returning them to rent others. Whatever we call it, that process has kept them both looking pretty decent, and has saved us a small fortune.

One bit of foresight on my part was that, as He began to shrink, I put away a pair of the largest size pants so that "someday" we could take one of those amazing "after" pictures that you sometimes see -- the skinny new body in the former fat pants. We also managed to hold onto the shirt jacket that He wore home from the hospital right after the surgery -- mostly because He just liked it so well that He was never quite willing to turn it loose. T manged to hang onto a couple of great big shirts (one of which was too small for her when she had her surgery), to help remind her of the size that was.

Today, we pulled out the camera and took some of those "after" photos. Perhaps as clearly as any other images, these photos give a clear impression of the radical change that has happened in our lives in 2009.

Here is Master --

And Here is T --

GOAL ATTAINED !! THE HARD WAY

The last 4 days, as I've been home from the hospital, I've lost weight steadily. I suspect this is my body's reflecting the weight loss I experienced during the six days I was NPO during my post surgical hospitalization. When I came home I was still swollen and had a good bit of edemous tissue. As those fluids have mobilized and been eliminated, my weight is dropping steadily. Ironically, these last few days at home, I am eating greater quantities of food with greater comfort than I have at any time since my gastric bypass last March. I am trying to be less restrictive in that my weight is down further.

At any rate, the weight of 165 pounds...the weight that sounded so ridiculously unattainable when my bariatric surgeon established it as my goal weight last spring....materialized when I stepped on my scale this morning. I would certainly not suggest the process I have undergone in losing this last six pounds or so for anyone, and certainly not for myself, but reality is that as of this morning my weight is 165 pounds. My next challenge I think is to work at stemming any further weight loss. You would never have convinced me a year ago that those words would ever describe a weight control objective for me.

So I am celebrating, somewhat with awe and somewhat with concern, having reached my original weight goal of 165 pounds.

I feel better and stronger each day as I rebound from my surgery. My pain is less and my strength and stamina are steadily increasing as I progress. I hope I will soon be back to feeling really healthy in time to enjoy the December holidays.

Thank you again to all of you who have traveled this journey with us and provided us such wonderful support and caring. You have made this outcome so much more attainable because of the gifts you shared with us here.

All the best,

Tom

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined

Frankenstein?

This was our first day at home. Our alarm clock went off first thing this morning, at 5:45, just as it does every single school day. That was an opportunity to "sleep in" actually since my usual get-up time while we were staying in the hospital was 4:30 AM.

Generally, here at home, I pile out of bed first and head off to shower and get dressed. Then I scramble out to the kitchen to make breakfast, lunch, and get us both ready to go. Of course, today and for the next bit of time, He doesn't need His lunch packed, and He isn't getting ready to "go" anywhere. So, this morning, as I was in the bathroom getting ready to go, He came in to pee and weigh and survey the damage. There were no full length mirrors in the hospital room -- just the one small mirror over the sink.

He is a "sight." He has a fairly long mid-line incision and 10 trocar incisions that were made to allow attachment of the mesh for the hernia repair. There are also two punctures where the surgical drains were installed in His abdomen. He has a pretty impressive hematoma on His belly, and enormous and ugly bruising on His hips that is the result of the heparin injections that they gave in the belly every day as a preventative for blood clotting. Standing there in the bathroom, checking it out, He said, "we ought to take some pictures of this."

So, bleary-eyed and sleepy-headed, I wandered off to find the camera and snap a few shots of the damage. They are not terrific -- I wasn't entirely awake yet, but perhaps they will give you some idea of what it is He's been through this last 8 days.

swan

Transfusion Day

Today, our team of doctors is stymied. They simply cannot figure out what is going on with Him, and I suspect that they are having some fairly heated doctor conversations about what to do with Him -- some arguing more aggressive approaches, and others advocating for restraint and patience. It seems that the latest x-rays are still showing some distension of the small intestine, and that could indicate another obstruction -- although the CT scan didn't show anything to be concerned about in that way.

But He continues to have significant nausea, and while He is having bowel movements, they are very watery and, this morning, essentially clear. Without being able to get a fix on what is happening, our doctors are opting for keeping the nasal tube in place. None of us are anxious to have to have that re-inserted again, so there's no sense of urgency to get it out before it is really time.

Another concern is that His blood counts, both red cells and white cells are low, and they can't figure out why. There is no blood in His stools; no blood in His vomit; no obvious hematomas that are not accounted for and entirely expected as a result of the surgery. Still, the counts are low.

So, today, He is receiving two units of blood. So far, that is going well. We are aware of the risks of transfusion, but we just don't feel likf there are good options.

swan